This section of Ch. 8 includes links to example essays from student writers like you.
These essays are all on the same assigned topic: Mt. Hood Community College.
This first essay was written for WR115 by Pablo Medina. He narrowed the subject to an appropriate size, “The Best Place to Study,” and stayed focused throughout the essay. He provides three examples of why his thesis is true, with each example more important than the previous one (emphatic order). His thesis is clearly stated in the introduction, his body paragraphs each have a topic sentence and specific details, and the conclusion is relevant without being repetitive. This is an excellent essay. https://saintsmhcc-my.sharepoint.com/:b:/g/personal/monteveg_mhcc_edu/EWnShSZ6lolHn_QRNYUbgcwBF7gEIBxmlN40ryx_pTIbJQ?e=kojj1U
This second essay by Jennifer Steimer was written for a WR121 class. She deals with the same topic as Pablo, but in a more complex way. She used a chronological structure to organize the essay and revised and edited to correct mechanical errors. One thing that makes the essay excellent is the quality of her details. https://saintsmhcc-my.sharepoint.com/:b:/g/personal/monteveg_mhcc_edu/EfOf3UyoKv9KvX_v0BNVIgIBLnCt2KzsnCLSyIMVGKhZxA?e=NVVIr1
This third essay by Brittany McLoughlin is another example of how specific detail makes an essay come alive. Her thesis is the last sentence in the introduction and her paragraphs all begin with topic sentences. Notice how she comes back to her original image of the butterflies in the conclusion, but she isn’t just repeating what she already said: she is expanding on it. https://saintsmhcc-my.sharepoint.com/:b:/g/personal/monteveg_mhcc_edu/EcpacGGkDj1ArJZXo7-ltZ0BCxu3WMIsJqnEoyKLxJiY2A?e=OoGOW7
This last essay by Angela Godfrey is another great example of organization and detail. Her concluding paragraph is an especially good example of expanding her point. Like all the other examples, Angela went over and over her essay–first on her own, then in an editing group, then again on her own–until she was confident it had no grammar or usage errors. https://saintsmhcc-my.sharepoint.com/:b:/g/personal/monteveg_mhcc_edu/Ec05SQKpiRJIjmHM-L6NMCABvZx9gpTRpBLIQYGDa7ZE0w?e=oDKP07